While onstage in Belgium over the weekend, Madonna reflected on her hospitalization for a bacterial infection back in June.

The singer got emotional Saturday night when thinking back to how sick she was just a few months ago, and told the crowd that she wasn’t feeling her best but was grateful to be alive.

“Less than four months ago, I was in a hospital and I was unconscious, and people were thinking, predicting that I might not make it,” she said, in fan-captured video. “It’s a f****** miracle that I’m here right now. My mother, God bless her, she must be watching over me — she said, ‘Girl, it’s not your time to go.’”

She added, “I had this strange thought. I suddenly had sympathy for my mother, not about the dying part, but how lonely she must have felt being in hospital, knowing that she wasn’t going to live.”

Madonna’s mother died from breast cancer when Madonna was five years old.

“I must tell you I don’t feel very well right now, but I can’t complain, because I’m alive,” she told the audience before pushing forward with the show. “Thank God for my children and all of your love and support.”

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