These days, Miranda Lambert is happily married to former NYPD officer Brendan McLoughlin — but she had to go through quite a few ups and downs to find happiness.

“When I turned 30, I started to take life in a new direction and really start to understand myself better,” the singer, now 38, tells People. “And going through hard things obviously makes you get to know yourself better.”

As a country superstar, Miranda has had to go through many of those “hard things” in the public eye. In 2015, she went through a divorce from fellow country superstar Blake Shelton after nearly five years of marriage.

“When you get broken down pretty good, you look at the mirror and you go, ‘I have to spend some time with me, learn who I am and what I want,’” Miranda continues. “I got to a really good place with myself. Then I met my husband.”

Despite all the heartache she endured, Miranda says she’s got no regrets. “Without the hard stuff — the chaos, the crazy schedule, the heartbreak, the falling in love, the falling out of love — I wouldn’t be who I am,” she points out. “I’m thankful for the lessons, even though they hurt at the time.”

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